MSM self-parody watch

Some things I noticed today while watching different TV monitors in a noisy restaurant, along with one print-media-related item:

1. Fox News had this so-called “facial coding expert” critiquing freeze-framed moments from last night’s debate. I suppose analyzing the shit out of what they say isn’t enough. And just how does one become an expert in facial coding? Seems like it would involve a lot of staring at faces of strangers in public settings. How many people did this guy have to creep out in order to obtain the proper qualifications to analyze the curvature of Obama’s lips in a split-second frame on a 24-hour cable news network? Did he ever get maced or kicked in the nads?

2. Televised competitive fishing on the ESPN networks has probably been going on for years. I can’t believe I’ve waited this long to explore the absurdity. I am aware that a great deal of thought, preparation and strategy goes into getting one’s self into a position to reel an optimal amount of fish out of water, but the fact is that the whole thing depends entirely on the behavior of dumb animals we really can’t control. I think there should be other guys with diving equipment under the water who have to try to grab the fish before they go for the bait. Now that’s something I…still won’t watch.

3. New York Magazine has rehashed a famous nude Marilyn Monroe photo shoot with that chick from the movie about mean high school girls. If you’re not aware of my antipathy toward cheap celebrity, go here. Still…what a great set of cans! (Here's a link from the aforementioned "news" network in case you give a shit what Neil Cavuto thinks about this.)